If you are considering premarital counseling, you are in good company. As many as 44% of today’s couples choose counseling before the wedding. Why are couples choosing counseling at this time, a time when they feel so in love? Why not wait until they really need it?
Why couples choose premarital counseling
It used to be the trend that couples would only seek counseling if the marriage was in trouble. Marriage counseling is a wonderful way to work through issues, but some problems can be avoided altogether with premarital counseling. Preventing a problem or knowing how to work through an issue can save you time, money, and heartache.
Christian premarital counseling seeks to resolve issues before they appear and arm you with skills to deal with problems and temptations. For example, some married couples hit a snag a few years into the marriage after the newness wears off and responsibilities become heavier.
Schedules may conflict, and arguments can ensue. The temptation to escape or look for another person can feel overwhelming. Premarital counseling prepares you by working around conflicting schedules, prioritizing the relationship and intimacy, managing anger, resolving conflicts, and avoiding temptations that can destroy the marriage.
Discuss the commitment of marriage
The sanctity of marriage is the foundation of any union. If you want your marriage to last, then you need to place importance on it. Prioritizing the relationship and forgiving the other person are essential tasks.
Living with another person is not always easy, and words may be spoken harshly. However, these words and behaviors should never become abusive. Abuse is another matter. If you are in an abusive relationship, seek help immediately.
Work out financial details and living arrangements
Before the wedding, discuss where you plan to live now and in the future. For example, do you want to purchase a home or rent while you build your career? How will you manage the finances?
If your partner volunteers to manage the financial accounts, make sure you know what income is coming into the home and the expenses. A financial advisor can also help you clarify questions about saving, investing, budgeting, and financing significant purchases like a house or car.
Work through conflict
Some couples skip premarital counseling because they are so in love and they believe that love can conquer all. In a sense, this is true. However, anytime humans live together, there is bound to be conflict. Counseling teaches you the skills to resolve conflict and defuse arguments before they reach the breaking point.
You also learn how to recognize scenarios that can lead to bad choices. Our thoughts lead to our emotions which in turn influence our behavior. If you know how to change your thoughts (your perceptions) about a situation, you are less likely to react impulsively.
Rash decisions or actions can destroy a marriage. Even if neither of you has an anger issue, counseling can help you work through tough situations together.
Contact us today for a premarital counseling session
If premarital counseling is a good fit for you, contact us today. Most couples receive eight hours or less of counseling before the marriage. We can work with your schedule for face-to-face or virtual sessions.
You can increase your chances of having a long-lasting and successful marriage by preparing in advance and gaining the necessary skills to weather any storm. Contact us today for your first session.
“Engagement”, Courtesy of Andre Jackson, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Proposal”, Courtesy of Colin + Meg, Unsplash.com, Unsplash+ License